CLICK HERE FOR FREE BLOGGER TEMPLATES, LINK BUTTONS AND MORE! »
Showing posts with label honest raw truth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label honest raw truth. Show all posts

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Honest Raw Truth

Before I even begin I just want to say that I am so blessed with Lexi and that we got pregnant with her and have a beautiful baby girl! She is such a blessing and means the world to me, even on weekends like this one has been. I wouldnt trade her for any baby in the whole world. I was catching up on my blogs and I was Reading Kelly's over at Little Looman Log and I feel like she just read my mind and spoke everything in there! Babies are HARD! They are so cute and cuddly and sweet it makes you wonder sometimes how they could possibly be so hard!

This morning when I took Lexi into the nursery (which lasted a whole 5 mins) I knew it was a bad idea because she had been crying and fussing since she woke up. Why?  Who knows! I have determined that she is just a fussy baby and likes to cry. She cries when she is crawling, eating, playing, being held, anything! Could this be due to GERD? certainly! teething? thats a great possibility! sinus/allergies? im thinking so but still, today was rough! So in nursery I gt called back to get her and I was in there talking to the ladies who were there saying how first time moms kids are too spoiled, and how all we do is hold them all day, and just pretty much bashing first time moms and stay at home moms. I was so frustrated! My child does get held alot yes because I love loving on her! Does she get held day in and day out? No! I have a house, myself, a husband and other things to take care of! she plays by herself at home, she was just in different surroundings she doesnt know with people we dont know. Yes it does have smething to do with that she hasnt been left with anyone but that is bc of family probs(long story). They then went on to say it would be easier on everyone if they would get put in nursery when they are a baby vs 7 mos old. Im sorry but im not putting my nb baby in the nursery to catch sickness and germs unless i have to! For real! 

Anyways back to the moral of the story. Most days I feel terrible about myself and feel like Im such a bad mom because my baby is so difficult and so unhappy. Why? I blame myself for everything that happens to her- thrush, colic, GERD, boo-boos, everything. Some days I think she deserves better than me! I lose patience sometimes and get frustrated but one thing never changes. The LOVE i have for my daughter. It grows bigger and bigger everyday! She is my wrld, just difficult most the time sometimes! Now dont think I am going to do something to her to hurt her, she is everything to me and I would never ever hurt her! It is just rough sometime! I hope this post doesnt make me seem like a bad person or mommy cuz I promise I love her with my whole heart and she is my whole world! <3 I love you Lexi Lynn! Every difficult part of your body baby girl!